Things I've Learned From Rap: How To Dress for Winter

Say what you want about hip hop and the urban fashion it inspires, but one thing that cannot be denied is the fact that these dudes are always adequately dressed.

For generations, there has been a constant battle between fashion and function. When these two elements meet in a harmonious middle, the results can be rather outstanding. I don't have the balls nor the income to sport fur coats during the winter months, but if I did, I would take Cam'ron's example below and wear matching fur in ridiculously effeminate colours. I would also throw some punctuation into the middle of my name.

Call these Lemonheads, Ice like Winnipeg

Besides wearing head-to-toe leather, is there another example of fashion that so clearly demonstrates man's place in the food chain. As far as I'm concerned, the squirrel-huggers over at PETA need to rip into a Slim Jim and draw a simple diagram detailing the 'Circle of Life'. Fur keeps its wearer warm, absorbs the smell of that purple kush and stray droplets of Crystal and efficiently insulates somebody slangin' dat rock on tha block. Kevlar vests are well-veiled by the bulkiness of such coats and it's quite easy to hide the firearm of choice beneath the contours of a fur coat because you need to keep that burner hot wardy. Take a clue from the people below and dress properly this winter and avoid the consequences of the com'mon cold.

Polow knows 'bout dat, Jeezy's was in da cleanaz

Humpty ain't tryin' see dem flu symptoms

Puffy and ya boy T.I.P. know 'bout dem chinchillaz

Fitty so insulated he don't need no shirt, but I ain't tryin' to seem dem milk glands wardy!

As a final note, should you not have the resources to afford a fur coat, something else I've learned from rap, and specifically the wisdomatic learning's of Silkk Tha Shocker, is that you can always 'Charge It 2 Da Game'.